Well we are in full swing now boys and girls. Looking down on party central that is the village, it looks all innocent and pure. PAH! A few hours ago I was having hands in the air moments with complete randomers to music that sounded twice as good as it ever does normally. I was persuaded to go to Taurus when I met Ian and the gang in the lift of the hotel, not much arm twisting is needed let’s be honest but there I went and there I found people I met last year!

From there it’s all pretty much a blur. The VIP area is better this year coz they have taken the banner down in the corner so that I can see (we complained last year and some one tried to burn a hole in it for me to see…nice boy). I ended up talking to a celeb that I didn’t know was a celeb, until her partner told me so. Looked this morning, sure enough there she is in the Pride booklet.

I think I may have talked to her about becoming a Pride Patron. My pitch was something like, “all these pretty boys on the telly and radio, not one of them in a wheelchair. You need me!”. I’ll let you know how serious she was, when we meet again at some point over the weekend.

Wont name drop further, it’s not big and it’s not clever and frankly I don’t know any of them. BUT TONIGHT is a different story, I’m havin me picture taken with Pixie Lott if it kills me. It wont but doesn’t that sound dramatic?

Off I go to make yet more history, get more snogs, more innapropriate and yet again not know how I’m getting across the street back here. Encountering a nobhead like last night probably, completely blanked me til he realised I had a room then he was all over me. Sorry mate, blank me in the rain if you want but that means karma will get you in the shape of hotel security asking you to leave the premises. Thanks for the help though, even if it was self motivated.

Peace, Love, and mines a vodka lime and lemonade I thank you.

Simon

Friday I check in to party central overlooking the village and get ready for one of the best times of my year (Fuertaventura, aside). I love this time of year because there is no one over my shoulder trying to take the nail polish off or telling me my shorts are too gay. It’s safe, it’s happy, it’s colourful and everyone can be themselves.

Three years ago I was on the street in the early hours of Tuesday morning (end of bank holiday and Pride)  and heading back to Chorlton in a cab with Taz. We had to be up again in about 4 hours for our first day working at a well-known bank. And we managed it. Rough as toast but we did it, coz well, Taz is a Marine.

Two years ago I was wondering whether I could flirt with Peter Andre’s people enough to get to meet him. As it happened the two people he brought as guests were very entertaining, the woman dropped her iphone down the portaloo and spent ages trying to get it working again. It died. It was funny. At the end of the night a whole VIP tent full of people were standing on tables listening to Mysterious Girl and I had met friends I’ve never seen since.

Whatever moments I write about here, wont do the event justice. I can’t tell you what its like to be bombing top speed up Canal Street and be stopped because a Drag Queen thinks you’re cute and wants to sit on your knee and have a photo (???). Nor can I tell you the name of the security guy that’s worked at the bottom of the VIP Tent ramp for as long as I’ve been going, don’t know his name but I remember him. I remember getting a busted wheelchair on Canal Street and being dragged back to the hotel  across the road by the hotel staff so it could be fixed and I could return.

I remember hands in the air moments to Together In Electric Dreams, Phil Oakey just standing there; I remember Bananarama singing ‘new’ songs when all anyone wanted to hear was Venus and I remember the voice that heckled from the crowd and was told to “Sit down you silly drag queen we’re singing it last”…

Last year I remembered the people I met and hopefully they are around this year. Add to that my closest friend and it should be a really amazing time.

By the way, if you snogged me in the cab on the way back to my hotel and then ran back to your boyfriend… hehehe, same time this year?

AND if you followed me around trying to take my picture for your Pride coverage, you have my number and should text me.

Be happy, be safe and above all if you see an adorable smiley minx of a thing on wheels, buy him a drink.

Claire enrolls at college today, I’m very proud of her and love her very much. Shsssshhhhhhhhhhhh

For those about to Party, we salute you.

Simon x

Greetings from the third floor! The party may be over but the wristband is still on (can’t find a pair of scissors).I had a fabulous time. It seemed to surprise people that I was there by myself but as I have said many times, every day was just chances to meet brand new people. The fact that I was more than happy to be under my own steam has everything to do with the fact that being comfortable and happy breeds confidence. If one second you think you are flagging a little bit, maybe overwhelmed, a muscly man in silver body paint throws himself on you and you’re back!

Last night I was introduced to two women who brought with them three guys, and an ice bucketed bottle of Pinot Grigio. Aside from putting ice cubes in wine, they were all top people!

It must be an inbuilt thing, because I never even realised I knew ALL the words to Gloria (Flashdance, if you are unsure…watch it). In other news, I stole a security person for about ten minutes in order to zoom around the village, I can only hope Taz didn’t get the sack. Bev Knight was immense even though I’m not a huge fan of her work, that girl has got some serious pipes on her.

My weekend ended amongst friends where it had begun, around my sofa at Taurus. I’m claiming said sofa, due to the fact that I jumped out of my wheelchair and shifted that fella. He had his face in an ipod at the time (AN IPOD…. when there’s a DJ in residence, bad taste… oooh I should tweet that one to the bad taste people). Henceforth and forthwith it is mine, and it was right that Cath and Lisa were around too because Cath and a poof from Four Poofs and a Piano had already met so, twas easy to get an intro to the man. Apologies for not knowing which one you were, but it was nice meeting you. You, sir, made me blush! *giggles*

Lastly a word for everyone else, to all those who found me, lost me, bumped into me again, or kept me all weekend,  to all those who felt the need to be in pictures with me or anyone I pestered in my adorable own way, and anyone else who I’ll remember in giggles for the next week, THANK YOU and see you next year. Darling, weren’t we fabulous?!

Pictures soon as. Moulty x

Greetings from the third floor! Canal Street will look pretty and clean when I go back downstairs in a few hours but last night / this morning it was like a plastic drink cup died and every other cup attended its funeral

Drama yesterday, my wheel broke and threatened to ruin my participation; thanks to the ever so helpful Miloslav, a screw was found and I was able to go on with the show. Touch wood it remains okay today.

I was at Taurus for the tombola, grabbed the Salford Ladies for a pic. Yesterday seemed to be my day for random’s coming up asking for pictures. People that are really important and happy for about a minute and then they’re gone and you never see them again…fab! I ended up chatting to an official photographer. I gave her the cold hard truth that there seemed to be a lack of good looking wheelchair people in the publicity, and talked meself into an event today. Who knows what will happen there. She was nice though, I did end up getting lumbered with her camera at various points and I think security were a bit suspicious.

It seemed to be massive dark glasses day yesterday, Mr Cotton and and Mr Krank were about again but by all accounts my attempts to be in the presence of one Sir Ian are going to be dashed. He was around on Saturday when I was taking my disco nap and isn’t expected back today. Foiled.

I’m not a huge fan of Kelis but her milkshake brought many a boy to the yard and once again I found and chatted to a great many of them. If one of them IS the actual boss of Selfridges in the city, I may have talked myself into a job after the op. I know the names of the two Scottish women I met on  the first night now, Cath and Lisa. As for the others… ships that pass. I’m going to be on a lot of people’s pictures and I invite them to find me on facebook and e-mail me (providing you are better than me at remembering names, that is).

Well done to Taurus and the S.L.U.T.S for raising £1,200 in 90 minutes!

Oh and it’s true what they say. Proper Scottish men wear nothing under their kilt.

Greetings! After the Parade and a bit of diplomatic military fact finding, (OK OK ogling….HAPPY???), I ended up lazing around my hotel and didn’t make it back to the village. It’s ok because Saturday’s always packed and I was prepared to duck out of the way for a bit. Today, more tarting around (technical term according to Tazmin) and then I really should go back to the stage. They’ve taken the beanbags away this year though so lounging is hard and you KNOW I will make an arse of meself if I try and get in the deckchair. I’ve yet to see anyone do so and keep dignified. The hunt for Sir Ian McK goes on, he was apparently there on Friday night and I missed him… I will have my photo taken with him, oh yes.

The magic £20 note that remained untouched Friday and Saturday afternoon, was spent on dinner last night so at some point I shall have to drag myself out of rainbow land and to somewhere that gives cash. In related news I saw the Barclays’ float yesterday too, I didn’t recognise anyone on there but I still felt the need to boo my former employer.

That is all except to say, my Mum came yesterday and it really meant a lot to me. She isn’t too well at the moment but she had an amazing time by all accounts. Oh and the Drag King and Queen was crowned on Friday, I was told that the winning queen had Cheryl Cole down to a T, eye lashes and all. The Salford Ladies United Temperance Society won It’s A Gay Knockout apparently.

Tara for a bit

Two days in and finally time to catch my breath. Eventually when I am home, the pictures will be on here but for now you’ll have to believe me…I’m having an awesome time. I was in the VIP marquee not 5 minutes before I’d met people, yet more close friends that I today can’t remember. They seemed awfully bent out of shape on my behalf when I found out that a massive banner obstructed my view but it was…erm…solved by someone who I’m sure did tell me their name. Jack Daniel? No?Belinda was okay, she’d got this look going on like she’d just got off her sofa, found her backing track CD and got on the metrolink. Outfit wise, she was poor. By the time Heaven 17 came on I was outta there and in Taurus where I stayed, apparently “perfecting the mischievous adorable” look. I have NO IDEA what this look is but it worked for me, didn’t buy a drink all night I don’t think. I was dying this morning when I met up with mum for the Parade. DYING. Like a trooper though I got over it, and my Mum really enjoyed her first Parade though.

It’s Saturday evening… the disco nap is around the corner for moi, gives a chance for the day crowd outside in the village to go home, before the fun starts again! Might go and see Chicane, might go and see the sofa at Taurus again, me and it hae formed a bond y’know people.Not to mention the half naked soldier lads that are there. I’m gonna get me one, and I’m hoping to have a chinwag with Sir Ian McKellan coz he’s a legend.

In a bit

Simon

Has it been a year since my departure from the Main Stage area caused so much upset to one guy, that he forgot his coat, wallet and boyfriend and chased after me? YES and it feels like it too but worry not, because as from Friday all the arguments, tears, medical crap, and all the chavs that think I’m gonna let them intimidate me on the tram back home… they don’t matter diddly. COZ PRIDE IS HERE, MY FRIENDS ARE HAPPY and it’s going to be time to make new memories.

I was with a friend today and, being the friend that I am, I helped her part with some of her payday reward… aren’t I nice? If you haven’t heard, Bury’s got brand spanking new shops and a coffee place everywhere so I am just helping to fulfill each shop’s own life mission. I’m also becoming an expert on which coffee place does decaf and, more importantly, which will let you sit there on one cup the longest before looking over disapprovingly because you haven’t bought food.

Tomorrow, it’s Belinda and if she doesn’t sing Heaven is a place on earth I will of course stamp my feet. I’m not a fan of Beverly Knight so if any of you are wondering if you can rescue me from my Canal Street haze of fabulousness, the night she is on stage will be your best bet. Get in touch. And if your wife is planning to spend all ya cash so that you all of a sudden can’t meet up with me (Nia), you need to let me know!

More over the weekend…. Hugs n Lipgloss!

Simon xxx

In the meantime – have this!

Onwards and sideways – Moultyx

I started the afternoon off in Tarus after being given the run around due to the need to collect my Pride pass from a hotel that the taxi couldn’t drop me off at. Complete mess. Anyway, I dragged the bell boy from the hotel over to canal street coz I told him I couldn’t make it the ’2 minute walk’ without killing myself in traffic. That puts me in Taurus, and I’m not there 5 minutes before Paul comes over and introduces himself and we sit there talking for about 90 minutes, it turns out he is a volunteer at the Ice Breakers Gay Group Therapy I signed up for, and he works with the LGF (lesbian gay foundation) too. Before long I spot a guy in a United top so I talk to him while I’m being served at the bar and he puts my first question to bed immediately by saying “Oh come on, as if I would wear a United shirt to Pride, I’m working hun!” – turns out he was the DJ.

It’s amazing how someone who has been completely destroyed and needs counselling and therapy and sometimes a long conversation witb friends just to get through the day, can be on top form in that environment. Without sounding corny, the Village does that to you. You end up meeting the most important people in your life, and you will know them for an entire five minutes to an hour and then they are gone.

I trolled round Canal Street in the downpour before making my way over to the Main Stage and trying out the portaloo. They are not made for wheelchair users. End of. Went into the VIP bit and it was all lit pink now, I’m sorry for anyone who might stop reading at this point but we all know I’m not the most man-ish man in the world and I does like me some camp adventure. Well I go in, and Girls Aloud is on and if that’s not a big flashing HELLO SIMON sign then I don’t know what is.

Lady Gaga, La Roux, Little Boots and Girls Aloud got verrrry good reactions from the crowd. There was a King and Queen contest with the winner leading the Parade tomorrow, and Bananarama! The Bananas’ were top stuff. Couldn’t give a crap about the new stuff they had to throw at us, everyone around me just wanted to hear two songs!  Once the newly duo singer band type thing had played Venus and Love in the Third Degree no-one gave a toss!

One of the bananas actually made me laugh when she said to a heckling drag queen who kept shouting for Venus - “OK OK it’s coming, are you going to do the dance routine with us? Thought not. Calm down, silly Goddess!” –

Met up with Taz after that, which was great coz I haven’t seen her in so long. No more drama to speak of till I remembered that I had forgotten to check the last tram time, for which a very very dear Twitter follower will remain a legend for helping with. Made the tram, got back to Bury and had to ask two complete strangers to help shift a homeless man asleep in the lift. I did in the end run over him slightly but I swear there was nothing I could do and the two that were with me told me he was out of it so it couldn’t be helped. I still am truly sorry.

Got back. Read that Noel had left Oasis. Devastated, and I mean that. I believed that the last gigs of the tour would lead to a band hiatus but not a permanent end. I will be more shocked as I have time to think about it but for now I just need sleep because I am at Albert Square, Manchesterford, tomorrow for the Parade.

Good night everyone, and the very special person without who’s help I wouldn’t have got home!

Peace, Love and Soul – Moultyx

First off there was this guy who kept asking us if we wanted food and I did so I got some, then he heard me say that I should have got more to eat coz I was hungry so he came back and offered me more food. Honest to God it was like I was eating a three course meal in installments… but the tunes were good and the chat was really random. If you were on Twitter then I can only hope it made sense.

Having both worked in Call Centres before me and David were sat there pissin our sides at the the thought of those life altering choices; “Yes you have swine flu” or “No, you don’t” – being made by people reading off a checklist they probably arent paying attention to. Because they’ve probably got a Team Leader standing over them going “Your average call time yesterday was 6 minutes, it’s too long, diagmose quicker.” So some poor bastard’s gonna be sat there givin people Swine Flu just so he can get quicker calls and make his quota! Either that or if you are unlucky enough to fall into the industry termed “five o’clock knobhead’ who rings just as you are about to finish your shift, they are probably gonna find they have swine flu too – just so you can get them off the phone in 2 minutes and leave at a reasonable time!

Nothing worse than everyone leaving a call centre team at the end of the shift and you are the one unlucky enough to get stuck with the knobhead who doesn’t understand that there is NOTHING YOU CAN DO!

We also discussed the fact that I knew facts about Christopher Lambert (Highlander). Christopher Lambert was unable to see without glasses and unable to wear contacts as he was and is allergic. Therefore every film you see him in without glasses, he is acting near enough blind. I said it would have been possible to have the Highlander wearing glasses….”I’m McCloud of the Clan McCloud and I should have gone to SpecSavers!”.

We reckon Christopher Lambert could have saved the two later Highlander sequels, if he had worn glasses! The fact that he didn’t was the reason they were shit. Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull? Shit. Solaris? Shit.

All of this was capped off brilliantly by being scooped onto the tram about 20 minutes ago, and sitting next to the spitting image of Sid Waddell of the darts. I’m sure it wasn’t him. But not entirely sure. Also, if you can name me another person who has managed to stumble towards the lift pushing a wheelchair one handed while listening to Katy Perry kissing girls… I’d like to meet them. Was quite surreal.

I’ve kissed several girls. It’s okay like. Wouldn’t write a song about it! I’ve Kissed A Boy probably wouldnt’t sell and I doubt as many would buy it.

Let me sleep off tonight’s alcohol and I’m right back there for tomorow, with Bananarama! Good times!

In a bit – Moultyx