I’ve come to realise that’s what I’m working on at the moment. All this therapy, mind building, confidence building and whatever else I’m doing within this time and space in my life, is creating the special edition of me.
I was a special edition before, but now I’m working on the definitive. Like when your favourite movie comes out on DVD and it has no extras and no Director commentary and it’s just the film on DVD, like Top Gun was when it was released in 2000. Then, to commemorate the 20th anniversary of it, they re release it on 2 discs with special features up the yin yang and commentaries, same movie just a definitive special edition.
Well, it’s taken some time and some major soul searching; Everyone will hate me, no one understands, my head doesn’t work right…work right damn you! But now I’ve got it, I’m here, I’ll never be here with this time and space ever again and when I’m out of this this better had be for keeps coz two battles with this shitty head mash is not fun.
The rebuilding is going well. I get to sit in an office lots and talk about my issues, lots, and the lovely lady talks about how I can handle situations in the future and how I can change so that this mind boggling doesn’t happen again. Then she talks about shoes, which is equally fab. Lord knows I can talk about clothes and shoes till the well dressed cows come home.
I’m very much going with the flow.
In a bit
Moulty
